Scarecrow and Mrs. King
There Goes the Neighborhood

(A foreign country. Men are unloading a big wooden box out of the back of a truck. The leader puts a box of explosives in a mud puddle in the road, then goes back to join the others. They set the box in front of him. He pries it open, using a crowbar. He pulls a salon hair dryer out of the box, nods, pleased, and places it carefully back in. An explosion near the site causes everyone to dive for cover. The truck driver drives off in a panic. Gunshots and minor explosions cause the driver not to watch the road. A big explosion erupts directly in front of the truck.)

(IFF. Billy and Lee exit from a door marked "Processing 1" and walk down the hall to their wing. Billy is carrying a tray with little pieces of evidence on it and a piece of paper in his hand. He throws down the paper in disgust and frustration.)
Billy: Not much to show for a man's life.
Lee: Don't cry too hard, Billy. A gunrunner like Lamarque gets responsible for more widows and orphans than yellow fever.
Billy: I just wish he hadn't got blown up before we found out who his munition source was, since America's getting hotter by the minute. And it's getting very difficult to explain why these rebels are running around with U.S. made guns!
Lee: Come on, Billy. We've got people down there, don't we? They'll find out something sooner or later.
Billy: Well, it better be sooner. Now, we hear a rebel assault is due in five days! (He holds up five fingers.) That will rattle all of our windows around here. (They stop outside the door.) Our orders are to stop the flow of guns. I'm putting your department on it, effective immediately.
Lee: Hey, Billy, there's a lot of anxiety in the air, huh?
Billy (hands him the paper): Here's why. It's all we have even vaguely in the way of a lead. It was here on the gunrunner's body.
Lee (reading): "Harriet Rosemont. 12374 Inde. . . .
Billy: Independence Lane.
Lee: Isn't that in the Betsy Ross Estates?
Billy: Well, apparently, this was a list of some kind. We can't make out any names, just a couple of streets. (He opens the door and enters, followed by Lee.) Betsy Ross Estates again.
(Francine joins them.)
Lee: What the hell could be happening at Betsy Ross Estates? It's hardly a hotbed of intrigue.
(They chuckle.)
Francine: Precisely what I used to think. But, then when I ran a double check on Betsy Ross Estates, I found the Congressional switchboard had lodged a call from a woman there last night. She was absolutely hysterical, and she would speak only to Congressman Holcomb*.
(The trio is now in Billy's office. Billy is behind his desk.)
Billy: Well, did he talk to her?
Francine: Billy! It was after six o'clock. Bumpy Holcomb* would already be in the yacht by that time, halfway through his soup course.
Lee (laughing): Bumpy?
(Francine turns to look at him, but actually avoids his eyes.)
Francine: To his more intimate friends, yes.
(She looks back at Billy, pleased. But at Lee's next line, her smile fades. She cocks her head and gets a faraway look in her eyes.)
Lee: I'll never know what you see in that guy. He's hardly your type.
Francine: He's got money, looks, power, a house down in Rio. He's exactly my type.
Billy (rolling his eyes): Francine. (She focuses back on him.) Who was this woman, and what did she want?
Francine (opening one of the files in her arms): All right, her name is Betty Bodine, and it looks like it had something to do with dangerous hair dryers. They referred her to Ralph Nader.
Billy: Get over to the Betsy Ross estates, would you? Check out Harriet Rosemont and this, uh, Bodine woman.
Francine: A day in the suburbs? Well, I welcome the challenge.
(She leaves.)
Billy: As for you, Scarecrow, I think, uh, you have a visitor upstairs.
Lee: Someone for me?
(Billy motions over at the monitor. A little wary, Lee leans over and takes a look. Amanda is standing in the waiting room, pacing. Lee turns back to Billy and sighs.)

(Waiting room. Amanda is pacing and reading some papers in a folder. Lee opens the door of the closet/elevator.)
Lee: Hi.
(Amanda turns and gasps. Seeing who it is, she relaxes.)
Amanda: Don't do that.
Lee: Say hi?
(Amanda laughs. Lee walks out and shuts the door.)
Amanda: Hello. (Lee shakes his head and goes over to her.) Don't you people ever use real doors? But what I really want to know is, where do you hang your coats?
(Lee laughs, then becomes serious.)
Lee: Amanda, I'm sort of busy at the moment, so, uh, what's up?
Amanda: Oh, uh, well, I just wanted to bring in the personal profile the Agency asked me to fill out the last time we were on a case together.
Lee: Amanda, we were not on a "case." We were thrown together completely by accident. A one-in-a-million kind of thing. A fluke.
Amanda: Right. Anyway, since I can't remember the name of my maternal great-great-grandmother, I thought that since you have to check my family tree for security leaks and I have to be on this probationary period, that while I'm on it, in the meantime, well, maybe, you could go ahead and I could work for you if you needed me. So . . . do you need me?
Lee: Uh-uh.
Amanda: Oh. . . . Well, then, I guess I'm free to consider other offers. Very attractive offers.
Lee: Sure. Amanda: Oh. So, I should call Warren Davenport.
Lee: Warren Davenport?
Amanda: Warren Davenport, at Honeycutt Typewriter. He's the head of personnel. He wants to interview me for a position.
(Lee walks over to the elevator.)
Lee: Great! And, listen, I'm sure that Billy would write you a letter of recommendation.
Amanda: No, no, no, no, no, no. That won't be necessary. My, uh, my skills speak for themselves. I type 90 words a minute.
Lee: And I'm sure you'd be much happier in an air-conditioned office instead of casing some dive with me.
Amanda: No doubt. As far as I can see, espionage is highly overrated. Good-bye. (She pushes Lee into the elevator and closes the door.) They don't even pay overtime.

(Betsy Ross estates. A car is pulling up outside a house, just as a police officer is leaving the house and entering his car. The first car stops and Francine gets out of the backseat. She sighs, looking exhausted, then flattens herself against the car as three kids zoom by on bicycles.)
Francine: Children. This case is nastier than I thought.
(She marches up the walkway to the house. Frank Bodine peeks out the window. Francine walks up to the door and knocks confidently. Immediately, Frank opens the door, as he was standing right there. He looks worn out and tired. Francine starts to talk, but Frank jumps in.)
Frank: Look, if you're selling Connie Beth Cosmetics, we already have more of that stuff than we need.
Francine: Mr. Bodine, do I look like I sell?
(Franks looks her up and down, then looks away, embarrassed.)
Frank: No, I guess not.
(Francine's face breaks into a smile again.)
Francine: I represent the United States. And as such, I'm responding to your wife's call. Is Betty about?
Frank (looking worried again): No, she's not. Betty was feeling so down, I made her go to her tennis lesson.
Francine: And when do you expect her back?
(A pause. Frank looks toward the sky.)
Frank: Eightteen hours ago.
(Francine raises her eyebrows. Then, when she is sure Frank is serious, she inhales and steps back.)

(Honeycutt Typewriter. Warren Davenport is interviewing Amanda. He is standing up and reading her application aloud. Amanda is sitting in a chair, nervous.)
Warren: Drives own car.
Amanda (laughing nervously): Yes.
Warren: College degree. Two children. (His face falls.) Ah. Divorced.
(He sits on his desk, pleased.)
Amanda: Well.
Warren: It's perfect. (Amanda raises her eyebrows.) You know, from where I sit, Mrs. King, everything looks . . . tip-top.
Amanda: Oh, well, I type 80 words a minute, 90 if you don't count typos, and I'd really rather not make coffee.
Warren: No. No coffee.
Amanda: Oh, well, uh . . . you have any other questions?
Warren: Is blue your favorite color?
(Amanda titters nervously.)
Amanda: Um, I beg your pardon?
Warren: Because it really should be, you know. And you would look . . . delicious in it.
(Amanda does not know what to say to this, so she just smiles. But a commotion outside the door causes them both to look up.)
Secretary: I'm sorry, Mr. Davenport is in conference! (Amanda turns back around, annoyed that some jerk is ruining her job interview.) No, no, you simply cannot go in there, Mr. King!
(Amanda whirls around in her chair. The door opens. Lee is standing there with the secretary trying to stop him. Warren is bewildered and betrayed. Amanda is surprised, understandably. Lee goes over, grabs Amanda's arm, and leads her out.)
Lee: Well, ha ha, there you are, you sly boots. I thought it was agreed, Babycakes, no job until the triplets are in nursery school!
Amanda (simultaneously): What are you talking about?
(Amanda and Lee are babbling at the same time, Amanda wondering what he is doing, and Lee playing his cover. Warren looks at Amanda's files, then looks at the weird scene, with a look on his face to match.)
Lee: You know, the little woman is so gosh-darn eager to earn some pin money. But I told her, the first four years of a child's life are more important than a new roof. Come on, Cookieface, it's two o'clock, feeding time.
(Amanda turns around and shrugs to Warren.)
Amanda: I swear, I don't know what is --
Lee: Uh, Timmy, Tammy, and Tommy are very hungry. (He pushes her out the door, then pops his head back in.) Bye.

(Center of town. Lee is still pushing Amanda along. They cross a street.)
Amanda: What the samhill do you think you are doing? First, you cannot get rid of me fast enough, then you barge in and drag me out of an interview for a perfectly good job. You say you are my husband, a lie which I do not find funny, and where do you think you are taking me?
Lee: We're getting married.
Amanda (turning): That's asking too much.
(Lee grabs her arm and holds her. He looks at her.)
Lee: Ah - ah - ah - ah - ah. I've got an assignment to last for the next three days. You're going to pose as my wife.
Amanda: I see. Well, find someone else.
(She tries to leave again, but Lee grabs her arm again.)
Lee: Ha ha. That's my exact thought. Believe me, it's not my idea.
Amanda: Oh, well, thank you. That makes me feel so much better.
Lee: Apparently, someone thinks we work pretty well together.
Amanda: Someone. Not you.
(Lee stops, annoyed, and looks at her.)
Lee: Billy. He ordered -- he suggested that we enlist your services for this case. Especially since it is right up your alley.
Amanda: Really. How so?
Lee: Well, guns are being smuggled from the United States to guerillas in Central America. A lot of people are getting killed. We want to know where those guns are coming from.
Amanda: Oh, that sounds right up my alley.
(Lee starts to nod, then glares at her and continues.)
Lee: Now, there may be a link to some of people in the Betsy Ross Estates. Francine checked out two of the names we have. Both are clean. One of the women is missing. So, Billy wants us to pose as a run-of-the-mill suburban couple, see if anything is going on. And he thought it would be kind of nice if at least one of us were authentic.
Amanda: Oh, well, I don't have to ask which one of us that might be.
(Lee glares at her again.)
Lee: Look. I have spent years operating in places like Morocco, Istanbul, I've mastered French, Dutch, a little Urdu, but what the heck do I know about everyday life? So how about it?
Amanda: Three days. (Lee nods.) Time off to see my boys?
Lee: I assure you, when this is all over, you never have to see me again.
Amanda: Well, since I obviously just lost a job at Honeycutt Typewriter, all right.
Lee: Now remember, as always, for security reasons, you are not to mention one word of this to your family, your friends --
Amanda: I know, I only wish I had had time to get started on that trainee orientation program.
Lee: Amanda, you do not need training for this one. It is a simple case. I mean, nothing bad ever happens in the suburbs.

(Suburbs. Something bad is happening. A car drives into a dark alley and shuts its headlights off. It stops. The doors open and two men get out. They go to the trunk and open it. They carry something heavy wrapped in a trash bag. Together, they toss it in a dumpster, grunting. They throw in a hair dryer after her.)
Man: Good-bye, Betty Bodine.
(They get back in their car and drive off.)

(King house. Amanda, with an armful of clothes is briskly trotting down the stairs. Dotty is following her, giving her the third degree about her interview.)
Dotty: What do you mean you didn't get the job at Honeycutt Typewriter? Didn't the interview go well?
Amanda: You certainly could say that.
(They are now in the kitchen.)
Dotty: Have you told Dean? I think you should. I have always found him a rock in my darkest moments.
(Amanda stops in her tracks and faces her mother.)
Amanda: You told my boyfriend your darkest moments?
Dotty: Well, um . . . he's so patient. It's like talking to a registered nurse.
(That does not make Amanda feel any better. Luckily, their conversation is interrupted by the boys. Jamie walks in first, followed by Phillip. They both head straight to the counter, where food is spread out.)
Jamie: Hi, Mom.
Dotty: Hi.
Amanda: Hi.
Both: Have you got your homework?
Boys: Yeah.
(They walk back toward the door with their freshly made lunches in paper bags. Amanda runs after them.)
Amanda: Okay, scoot. Come on. Uh, and, uh, uh, Jamie, we have to work on your spelling tonight.
(Both boys stop and turn around.)
Jamie: But I've got soccer practice, then play rehearsal. Then I've got to make a map of Virginia out of dough.
Amanda (shrugging): Okay, well, we'll do it after you do all that.
Phillip: You said we could spend the night at Kenneth's house.
Amanda: I did?
Boys: Mm-hmm.
(Amanda smiles and shrugs. A horn beeps outside. Phillip and Jamie turn to go.)
Jamie: There's the bus!
Amanda: Oh, wait, wait, come here, you forgot something very important! (They boys come back. They kiss her cheeks at the same time, Jamie on her left, Phillip on her right.) Love you.
(Phillip and Jamie run outside. Amanda waves after them.)
Jamie: Bye, Grandma!
Phillip: Good-bye, Grandma!
Dotty: Bye!
Amanda: You realize I have to make an appointment to see my own children?
Dotty: I know. It's terrifying how fast they drift away. I mean, one minute you're changing their diapers, and the next minute, they're off in Honduras, getting tattoos.
(Amanda is silent for a minute. Then she picks up right where she left off, walking through the kitchen to the other door. She swings her pocketbook over her shoulder.)
Amanda: Mother, ahh . . . listen. I'm going to be a little late tonight, so don't wait up for me.
Dotty: Oh. Where will you be? (Amanda turns around, getting ready to answer, when Dotty suddenly notices her arms are full of clothes.) Where will you be?
(Amanda shifts her weight uneasily and glances at her luggage, groping for an answer.)
Amanda: Oh, I'm going to be . . . working . . . at my club's rummage sale and I thought I would . . . donate a few things.
(She indicates her clothes. Dotty walks over and fingers a green shirt.)
Dotty: Are you getting rid of this green blouse? (Amanda nods hesitantly.) Oh, Amanda. Bless you. I probably never mentioned the strange things it did to you, did I?
Amanda: No, you never did.
Dotty: Amanda, why didn't you tell me that you were going to have a rummage sale? I would love to contribute something.
(She runs out of the room. Amanda's smile fades.)

(Suburban house in the Betsy Ross estates. Focus on a large, hideous boar's head. Back up to reveal Amanda leaning on the horns, holding it up. Lee is next to her, staring at the head. Amanda is trying to watch the movers in the background moving pieces of furniture and boxes from a van into the house.)
Lee (dryly): Will you be bringing lots of things from home?
Amanda: I told my mother I was working at a rummage sale. This is really very nice. But is anybody telling these guys where to put things? Yoo-hoo! Excuse me!
(She pats the boar. Lee takes her place holding it up while Amanda runs into the house.)
Lee: Yeah.
Amanda: Thanks. Hello! Excuse me!
(Lee bends down to pick up the boar. He sighs.)
Lee: I'm not going to like this.
(He lifts it, grunting and grimacing, and follows Amanda inside.)

(Inside. Amanda is in the dining room, arranging flowers in a vase, with a towel on her shoulder. Lee is in the living room, nailing up the boar. He leans back to admire his handiwork. Amanda picks up the vase and carries it in the living room. She sets it on the coffee table.)
Amanda: Well, I have all the boxes unpacked, I have the glasses washed, I have the shelf papered down. Why do I look so messy and you look so good?
Lee (shrugging): Beats me.
(Amanda looks around at the neatened room.)
Amanda: Lee? Have you done anything?
Lee: Are you kidding?
(Lee gestured toward the boar. Amanda backs up and holds up her hands.)
Amanda (mocking him): Oh. I'm sorry. Maybe you'd better take a break.
(Lee glares at her, then goes over to the bar to pour a drink.)
Lee: Amanda, we are only going to be here a couple of days!
Amanda: You know, I'm not at all sure about this chair. Who picked this stuff?
(Lee glances, then drops two ice cubes into his glass.)
Lee: Oh, that's Government Issue Suburban Grouping. We do this kind of thing a lot, you know. This stuff's been used before.
(He pours his drink. Amanda picks up a pillow from the sofa and examines it. She notices a blackened hole in the top corner.)
Amanda: Mm-hmm. Oh. Yeah. I can see that. (indicates hole) Cigarette burn?
(Lee looks up, then shakes his head.)
Lee: Uh-uh. Bullet hole. (Amanda nods. Lee walks over with his drink.) Our next step is finding a way to get to know these people.
Amanda: Boy, you really don't know the suburbs, do you? The last thing in the world we have to worry about is meeting people. (doorbell) You see, that's probably the Welcome Wagon right now. Here, why don't you turn this bullet hole toward the sofa? (She hands him the cushion and leaves to open the door. Lee puts down his drink.)
Lee: Yeah.
(He puts the cushion in place just as Amanda opens the door. A bunch of people are standing there.)
People: Hi! Welcome to the neighborhood!
(Amanda gestures for them to come in. Lee grabs his drink and stands there, looking cool and casual. All the people enter in single file, each one saying hello to Amanda. Among the people are Frank Bodine, Harriet Rosemont, Judy Wainwright, and Karen Turkell.)
Amanda: Hello. Come right ahead in.

(Kitchen. Lee is making strawberry daiquiris and being grumpy about it. Amanda enters with an empty tray. Outside the room, people are laughing and chatting.)
Lee: Strawberries. . . .
Amanda: We're running low on bean dip.
(She crosses behind Lee to get some. She comes back with a bowl.)
Lee: I want to talk to that Harriet Rosemont. It's her name they found on the gunrunner's body.
(He pours rum into the blender.)
Amanda: Hmm. I need two more strawberry daiquiris. Go easy on the rum. (He stops pouring and screws the cap on the rum.)
Lee: Where in my contract does it say that I have to make daiquiris? I hate this. I want a divorce.
(He puts the top on the blender and turns it on. Amanda looks up and waves to someone outside. Then she looks at Lee.)
Amanda: Oh, listen, um, when you're through with this, would you like to barbecue? You're really doing very well. (He looks at her.) Really. Really.
(She picks up the now-full tray and leaves. Lee looks after her, then down at the blender and jabs the button again.)

(Living room. Amanda carries the tray to a man and a woman talking and offers them some food.)
Amanda: Here's your drink.
(The woman takes her drink and Amanda turns around. A tall man walks up to her and takes some food off her tray.)
Neighbor: So, Mrs. Morton, your husband's in the commodities business, is he?
Amanda: Well, yes.
Neighbor: Looks like he's done very well for himself.
Amanda: Well, yeah, he's, he's, um. . . .
Neighbor: You two been married long?
Amanda: Ah, well, it hardly seems like any time at all, you know?
Neighbor: Mm. First marriage, huh?
(Judy walks over and takes Amanda's arm.)
Judy: Excuse me. (Amanda goes with her, thankfully. Judy winds around the crowd, taking Amanda to her friends, Karen and Harriet.) You looked like you needed rescuing, Amanda. Is it Amanda?
Amanda: Yes, it is Amanda.
Judy: Oh, good. Well, I'm Judy Wainwright, and these are my friends Karen Turkell and Harriet Rosemont.
(She gestures to them. Amanda nods hello.)
Amanda (recognizing that name): Harriet.
Judy: Your husband was telling me you're anxious to become involved in the neighborhood.
Amanda: Oh, he was, was he.
Karen: My Bluebird troop could use a Reptile lady.
Amanda: Oh, really? Well, you know, I am very anxious to become involved with the neighborhood, and I'd like to get to know everybody, but, unfortunately, I am looking for work, so...
Judy: Are you? Well, Amanda, we might just have the perfect idea for you, don't we, Harriet?
Harriet: Well . . . sure.
Judy: Now, Harriet, don't be like that. She's so competitive. There's always room for one more Connie Beth girl. (The doorbell rings. Amanda raises her eyebrows at Judy.)
Amanda: Connie Beth girl?
(Lee makes his way through the people to the door. He smiles at Amanda.)
Lee: I'll get it.
(The doorbell rings again. Lee opens it up. A policeman is standing there. The party quiets down.)
Policeman: I'm sorry to bother you, sir, but I saw there was a party going on. Is there a Mr. (checks notebook) Frank Bodine here, by any chance?
Lee: Yeah. Frank! (Frank appears from the crowd.) Frank, there's uh, someone here to see you.
(Frank walks over to the door. The policeman takes his hat off.)
Policeman: Mr. Bodine? I think we have some bad news, sir.
Frank: Yes?
Policeman: Sir, we think that we found your wife's body.
(Frank looks over at Lee. Lee looks straight ahead with a determined, angry look in his eyes. He looks towards the living room.)

(Later that night. Lee is in the bathroom. You hear water running and someone brushing their teeth. Amanda is waiting for her turn.)
Amanda: You know, with all that's happened, you may need me here.
(Lee leans out the bathroom door, still brushing his teeth.)
Lee: Hnh?
(Amanda is sitting backwards in a chair in the living room, hanging her arms over the top. She swings them around and sits sideways.)
Amanda: Do you really think I ought to take that job Judy was talking about?
(Lee takes his toothbrush out of his mouth and talks slightly garbled with a mouthful of toothpaste.)
Lee: Amanda, selling Connie Beth Cosmetics door-to-door is perfect! You'll be inside every house in this area.
(Amanda gets up and walks over to him.)
Amanda: Yeah. I have the blisters to prove it, too. Look, if we're going to go search the Bodines' house, let's do it. I'm not going to call my mother again and tell her the rummage sale's still running late. (Lee, having finished brushing, comes out of the bathroom, unbuttoning his shirt. He heads for the bedroom.) What are you doing?
Lee: Well, I'm going to bed. (Amanda's jaw drops.) We can't go over there till three or four in the morning.
Amanda: Why not? Frank's not there. He's at the Rosemonts'.
Lee: I don't want anyone up to watch us break in. Now, are you coming?
(He gestures toward the bedroom. Amanda's eyes are wide.)
Amanda: No! I can't sleep here. How would I explain it? I'd feel like I was lying and sneaking.
Lee: You are lying and sneaking. You're working for the government.
Amanda: No! I mean . . . I would feel guilty. You know? (Lee looks at her.) Like I was . . . having a thing. Or something. You know?
Lee: A "thing"?
Amanda: Yes, you know. A thing.
Lee: Like an affair?
Amanda: Yes. That kind of a thing.
Lee: Well, you're not. Now, do you like a window open at night?
(He gestures to the bedroom.)
Amanda: Lee. I have to consider Dean.
Lee: Okay. How does he feel about windows?
Amanda: Never mind, never mind. You don't understand --
Lee: All I understand is that we are on a job. Now this is purely business, is that not correct?
Amanda: Yes, that is correct.
Lee: Okay, then one of us gets the bed, the other the couch, I don't care. But the important thing is that we get some sleep. You tend to get killed less often that way.
(He goes back to the bedroom. Amanda leans against the wall.)
Amanda: Who gets the bed?
(Lee turns around.)
Lee: The senior agent always gets the bed. (Amanda rolls her eyes.) Get your mind out of the gutter, would you?
(Amanda turns around and walks to the couch, disgusted.)
Amanda: Ugghh.

(Dining room in a fancy house. A large picture is over the mantle of a beautiful woman. A short man is standing under it, gazing up at it.)
Bobby: Mom always said I could never keep a secret. Well, I've kept this one, Mom. And if you could talk, you'd say, "I'm proud of you, Bobby."
(The door opens. Bobby regains his dignity. Two men walk into the room. They are the same two men who threw Betty's body into the dumpster. They walk over to Bobby. Bobby walks over to them. They meet in the middle and Bobby puts his arms around their shoulders.)
Man #1: Well, they haven't found the body.
Bobby: Very, very efficient. I feel bad, naturally, about poor Mrs. Bodine, but when she stumbled in on our little secret, well, we couldn't have her going to the government people, could we? Where's the rest of the shipment?
Man #1: Probably at her house.
Bobby: Well, get it. Without being seen. I don't want anyone coming here looking for it. (Wordlessly, the two men turn around and leave the room. Bobby walks back over to the mantle and looks up at the portrait.) You never said "I'm proud of you, Bobby." But Mum, I'm going to be so frightfully rich.

(Frank Bodine's house. A lawn jockey is outside. Inside, Lee and Amanda are opening the slider and stepping inside. Lee closes it while Amanda shines her flashlight around. Lee looks at her, then pushes her flashlight to aim it downward.)
Lee: Keep it down.
Amanda: This gives me the creeps.
(Still holding her flashlight down, Lee shines his flashlight around. Then he points to the right.)
Lee: This way. (He tiptoes to where he pointed. Amanda follows close behind.) We're looking for letters, diaries, phone numbers, anything unusual.
Amanda: Okay.
(They creep past a big desk full of knickknacks. Lee turns around, clear that he doesn't want Amanda that close.)
Lee: I'll check upstairs.
Amanda: Where should I check?
Lee: Well -- just check.
Amanda: Just check.
(Lee tiptoes up the creaky staircase. Amanda watches his until he is out of sight, then turns around. She shines her flashlight around, looking for someplace to check. She spots a closed door and approaches it. She knocks first, then opens it after not hearing a response. The room she has found is the bathroom. On the counter are assorted things like toothbrushes, cosmetics, and hair dryers. Amanda's flashlight focuses on each one and stops on the hair dryer. She picks it up and sniffs it, then puts it down slowly. A cat yowling outside causes her to jump.)
Amanda: Lee? (Realizing that it was just a cat, Amanda lets out her breath and cautiously creeps to the door. She peeks around the corner.) Lee? (She tiptoes over to the staircase, but a clatter startles her and she turns around in the opposite direction.) Lee? (She slowly enters the kitchen.) Lee? (A hand reaches out from under the table and grabs her ankle. Amanda screams. Then she sees another hand reaching up dazedly for something to hold onto and realizes who it is.) Mr. Bodine! (She pulls him out from under the table.) Oh, Mr. Bodeen! (She looks at her hand, which is now full of blood. Frank grunts with pain. The door opens. Amanda turns her head around and sees a head covered with a black mask. The man attached to the head sees her, then closes the door. Amanda yells up to Lee.) Lee! Lee! Lee, they're getting away!
(Lee is already outside, looking at the window they broke into. He hears Amanda's cries and jumps over the hedge. He unzips his jacket and extracts his gun. But a truck barrels through the garage door and heads straight for him. He tries to get away, but the truck follows. Lee looks over his shoulder at the truck and trips. He falls into a bush and the truck misses. Lee sighs with relief, then sees the guy above him about to stab him with a pink plastic flamingo. Lee huddles over to one side, and the flamingo spears the jacket.Lee kicks the attacker's leg and the attacker falls. Lee jumps up and runs over for his own weapon. He grabs the first dangerous thing he sees, which happens to be another flamingo. He thrusts it out, then looks down, realizing what is in his hand. But there is no time tothink about it. The other guy thrusts at Lee, who defends beautifully. Then Lee ducks a high swing and blocks the next. He uses the time to kick the guy in his stomach. The guy droops. Lee punches him in the jaw and the man goes down. But now the van is coming back for another try. Lee tosses the flamingo aside and dives into the bush again. He is about to get up, but the van drives by again, so Lee hides. The truck's door opens and Lee's attacker gets pulled inside. Now the van drives away for good. Lee runs over and picks up his gun where he dropped it and runs inside to Amanda and Frank. He opens the door with his gun at the ready, then drops his guard. Amanda still has Frank's head in her lap. Frank is about to die. Lee stuffs his gun into his shoulder holster and joins Amanda. Frank looks at her to speak his last words.)
Frank: Hair . . . dryer . . .
(He's dead. Amanda and Lee look at each other.)

(Grocery store parking lot. Amanda ad Dotty are walking to their car with a shopping cart loaded with groceries. Phillip and Jamie are running around. Well, Phillip is running, Jamie is being pushed by him in a shopping cart.)
Dotty: My teacher said I showed great promise, that probably I should take up pottery as a career.
Amanda: Wow.
Dotty: He's going to show some of my stuff at one of those places, you know, that makes souvenir plates --
Amanda: Boys! Well, that's wonderful, Mother. Come on, boys! Stop it!
Dotty: What time did you get home last night? You look exhausted. Amanda: Well, by the time we cleaned up after the rummage sale and counted the profits, it was pretty late.
Dotty: Well, Dean just kept calling and calling.
Amanda: He kept calling and calling?
Dotty: Well, twice. I just kept saying, "Not yet, not yet." He is patient.
(A car horn honks. Dotty and Amanda stop and look at who is honking.)
Harriet: Yoo-hoo! (She drives up and leans out the window to talk. While she is talking, Amanda keeps looking uneasily at her mother out of the corner of her eye. Dotty is confused.) Is that you? It is! Listen, they sent over your sample case, so I guess you can start your route today. Isn't that awful about poor Frank getting stabbed? You know, he'd come over to our place, but, he just couldn't sleep, so he went on home and that's when they got him. And he was so upset about poor Betty getting strangled. Well, I've got to run. You say hi to your husband. Bye!
(She drives off. Amanda was half-waving, but she pretends to adjust her pocketbook and turns to her mother.)
Amanda: I guess she thought I was someone else!
(Quickly she gets into the car, leaving Dotty staring after the strange woman who thought Amanda was married.)

(Bobby's dining room. Bobby is talking to the two men, this time already in the room.)
Bobby: You sure they didn't get a good look at you?
Man #1: Our faces were covered.
Bobby: But you recognized them?
Man #1: Yes.
Bobby: And you retrieved the entire shipment from the garage? (Both men nod. Bobby crosses in front of the desk and starts walking the men to the door.) Good. I don't want any trouble at this point. If we don't finish filling this order within a week, we don't get paid. I want to know who those people are, what they saw, and what Frank said to them. And then, I want them dead. (He opens the door and the men leave. Bobby closes it and walks over to his mother's picture.) Like you always said, Mum, it's a dog-eat-dog world.

(Outside dining area. Harriet and Amanda are sitting at one table. Harriet finishes her drink, then looks around for a waiter. She finds one, and waves her hand at him.)
Harriet: Uh, another vodka, straight up. (Amanda looks down at Harriet's empty glass, then looks back up and smiles. Harriet turns to her.) Well, Amanda. You should be pleased. You did very well today.
Amanda: Really?
Harriet: Mm-hmm.
Amanda: Boy, that door-to-door selling's really tough.
Harriet: Oh, only at first. But if you stick with Connie Beth, you might become a Golden Circle Girl.
Amanda: Have you made it that far?
Harriet: Oh, sure. So are Karen and Judy. And poor Betty Bodine before she died. (Amanda thinks about that. Suddenly, Harriet reaches over and puts her hand on Amanda's.) Oh, Amanda. I'm going to help you become a Golden Circle Girl. I know they say I'm competitive, but I'm through with all that. I owe it to Betty.
Amanda: You do?
Harriet: Amanda, I've never told this to another living soul, but . . . I think I may have gotten Betty in trouble with the company. She did something entirely against policy, and, uh . . . I . . . I think I may have let that slip to management.
Amanda: What did she do?
Harriet: I just can't talk about that. In fact, I think I have to run.
(She gathers her things and starts to leave. Amanda reaches out and stops her.)
Amanda: Oh, Harriet, wait. Please tell me, just, uh, if -- if Golden Circle Girls don't sell, what do they do?
(Harriet settles back in her seat.)
Harriet: Well . . . I guess, uh . . . we supply the personal touch to some of our bigger, fussier clients. I, for example, personally deliver shipments to my local customers. And, for my international clients, I clear their orders through Customs to make sure it gets on the plane.
Amanda: You have a lot of clients outside the country who order from Connie Beth?
Harriet: And some of our clients live in sort of primitive places. I mean, they really appreciate our line of beauty appliances.
Amanda: Appliances?
Harriet: Oh, well, you know, um . . . electric rollers, facial saunas, curling irons.
Amanda: Hair dryers.
Harriet: Absolutely. One of our hottest items.

(Lee and Amanda's suburban house. Lee is drinking a glass of water at the table. Amanda is hammering pictures on the wall.)
Lee: There's something strange about this whole Connie Beth thing, that's all. (Amanda finishes hanging the picture of Dean holding up a large fish, blocking his face. Amanda walks over to the counter, leaving the picture crooked. Lee continues talking straight ahead.) Not only did a murdered woman mention dangerous hair dryers, but those were her husband's dying words. And this Lamarque guy has Harriet Rosemont's name on him. What does Harriet Rosemont do? She works for Connie Beth. What does Connie Beth sell? Hair dryers. (Amanda keeps on walking back and forth between the refrigerator and the counter.) What do you suppose Betty Bodine did that got her in trouble with the company? (He points to Dean's picture.) It's crooked.
(Amanda looks up.)
Amanda: It is?
Lee: Yeah.
(Amanda walks over to the picture.)
Amanda: Oh.
(She straightens it.)
Lee: What is it?
(Amanda turns around proudly.)
Amanda: Dean. On our vacation in Arkansas.
Lee: Good likeness. You and whats-his-name do a lot of fishing, do you?
Amanda: Dean, and yes, we do. Could we get on with the other conversation?
(She walks angrily back to the food she has spread out on the counter.)
Lee: Well, I spent all morning running a recheck on Harriet and her friends Judy and Karen. All clean as a whistle. Why'd you hang new curtains in the kitchen?
Amanda: Well, because the old ones didn't go with the rug that I got for the breakfast nook and I like my kitchen to be cheery.
Lee: But, Amanda, this isn't your kitchen. It's not for real.
Amanda: Well, I know, but you know, people will come in and out of here, and it reflects the kind of people we are and it's just the way you do a kitchen.
Lee: No, no, no, no. No. How you do a kitchen is you hire a guy with a French name, tell him how much you want to spend, then go skiing till it's over.
Amanda: You know, that's your whole problem. You're out of touch.
Lee: Out of touch with what?
Amanda: The way normal people do things.
Lee: I'm normal.
Amanda: Oh, sure. You think sunbathing in Borneo's normal. You know, most people just want to get through a day with healthy kids, friends they can count on, a regular job, and a roof over their heads.
Lee: Fine. That normal I'm not.
Amanda: I don't know how you expect to get to know the people here. I mean, you never go outside and say, "Hey, that's a great looking lawn," or um, "Who's your tile man?" or, "Where'd your kid get her braces?"
(Lee's had it. He slaps the table, stands up, and marches over to her.)
Lee: All right. You are so damn normal, you solve the case.
Amanda: Well, maybe I will.
Lee: Yeah?
Amanda: Yeah.
Lee: What makes you think so?
Amanda: Well, I'm the one who noticed the smoke on Betty Bodine's hair dryer.
Lee: And I am the one who told you it must have short-circuited.
Amanda: Right. So it's broken, right? So she's standing there, she's got wet hair. She's desperate. If she doesn't do something soon, it's gonna frizz all out. But out in the garage, she's got boxes and boxes of those hair dryers. So what does she do? I'll tell you what she does. She goes out there and she opens one of the boxes. And that's what Harriet tells the company, and that's what gets her in trouble, and that's what gets her killed.
Lee: Did you just think of that?
Amanda: Yeah, dumb?
Lee: No, good.
Amanda: Oh, thanks!
(Lee walks back over to the table. Amanda catches her breath. Lee picks up his book.)
Lee: You said Betty Bodine was one of these people with the special clients?
Amanda: Yeah, that's right. A Golden Circle Girl.
Lee: Makes you wonder about these special clients, doesn't it?
Amanda: Yeah. Judy Wainwright's making some deliveries today.
(Lee closes his book and stands up.)
Lee: Maybe I'll keep an eye on Judy. (He takes his jacket from another chair.) You want me to pick up some groceries for dinner?
Amanda: No, no, that's all right. I have a Connie Beth sales meeting.
Lee: Yeah, right. (Amanda walks over next to him They look at each other.) You know what just happened?
Amanda: What?
Lee: We just had our first fight. As man and wife, that is.
Amanda: Ah. Yeah. Right here in our cheery kitchen.
Lee: Yeah. Well, I guess I'll see you later.
Amanda (nodding): Yup. (They pause, then shake hands and laugh nervously.) Have a good, um. . . .
Lee: Yeah. You too. (They turn in opposite directions, Lee to go and Amanda to get back to her food. Lee turns around.) You know what?
(Amandaturns around.)
Amanda: What?
Lee: I like blue a lot better.
(He motions toward the new curtains.)
Amanda: Oh. Good, I'm -- I'm glad.
(He waves at her, then leaves. She stands there and watches him go.)

(Lee is driving in his Porsche, following Judy in her red car. He continues following her until she reaches a place called Mercury Express. A guard is standing outside the building. Judy pulls up, Lee soon after. Judy gets out of her car. The guard walks over.)
Judy: I'll just be double-parked a sec, now.
Officer: No problem, Mrs. Wainwright. You should have your name put on this space. Let me help you with that box.
(Lee gets out of his car and stays low. He watches as the policeman helps Judy with her big Connie Beth box.)
Judy: Oh, you're so sweet. Thank you. Here, I'll get that. (She closes the car door while the policeman struggles with the box. They walk together into the building.) So tell me, how's your family?
Officer: Oh, fine. They enjoyed the gift you gave them.
Judy: Oh. Are your kids coming home for the holidays?
Officer: Uh, yeah. Only one of them, though. The other is behind in schoolwork. (They continue to walk inside. Lee goes to the back of a truck and picks up a pile of boxes while the driver is taking more out of the truck. Lee hides behind the pile and carries it inside. The policeman stops him at the door.) Oh. I'll give you a hand with that.
Lee: Uh, no. Thank you. I'm fine.
(The truck driver tosses a box behind him, expecting it to land on top of a pile. Instead, it drops, and the driver looks behind him, confused. Inside, Lee is still behind the boxes, listening to the conversation going on between Judy and the desk clerk, Bill.)
Bill: Usual shipment, Mrs. Wainwright?
Judy: Oh, yeah, give or take a curling iron or two, Bill.
Bill (to Lee): Uh, be right with you, sir.
Lee: Yeah, thanks.
(Lee places the boxes on a table, but keeps his back to Judy and listens some more.)
Bill: Boy, them señoritas down there must really like what you sell. (Judy laughs.) You just sign these papers right here, and I'll make sure your things go right through Customs without having to wait at all.
Judy: Oh, thank you, Bill. (Lee leaves, having heard what he wanted.) Oh, did your wife like those night cream samples I gave her?
Bill: Oh, she loved them!
(Outside, Lee is coming out of the door, satisfied. But he stops at the edge of the curb and his face falls. The policeman is putting a parking ticket on his windshield. Lee sighs, then gets down next to Judy's car and peers in the window. A box is sitting on the seat. He puts it under his arm and hurries off. There is still one box on the seat. It reads "Connie Beth.")

(IFF. Billy's office. Lee is sitting at Billy's desk, taking apart hair dryers and things. Billy and Francine are seated next to the door on a bench, looking in the face cream jars. Lee screws off the top of the hair dryer and sets it down carefully.)
Billy: Anything look strange to you, Francine?
Francine: All of it. I never use domestic cream. (She sets down her jar and walks over to Lee, ready with teasing ammo.) So, how is married life treating you, huh? Dinner at six? Dishes at seven? TV till nine?
Lee: Bed.
Francine: Bed?
Lee: You know, Francine, I've gained a lot of respect for the generosity and . . . stamina of the American housewife.
Francine: You're disgusting.
(Lee gets an "I'm-teasing-you-and-I-won" smile, then it turns into an "Aha" smile. He beckons to Billy.)
Lee: Billy. Come over here and look at this. (Billy stands up and walks over. Lee holds up a piece of a hair dryer.) What's this look like to you?
Billy: I don't know. Part of a hair dryer.
(Lee holds up another piece.)
Lee: And . . . what's this?
Billy: More of the same.
Lee: Exactly. This is what they're attached to.
(He puts together pieces of a gun. Billy and Francine stare at it, disbelieving.)
Billy: That's part of a gun.
Lee: Exactly. They're full of this stuff. Hidden among the regular dryer parts.
(He picks up a plastic dryer frame. Billy turns his head to Francine, then back to Lee.)
Billy: And who knows what they put in their bigger products?
(Lee stands up, as if to make a point.)
Lee: That is why Lamarque had Harriet Rosemont's name on him. She was supplying it, his very own Connie Beth girl!
Billy: And that floated right by Customs because we're looking for whole weapons, not bits and pieces! (Lee smiles, smug.) And these housewives are the key to the whole thing.
Francine: What generosity and stamina.
(She looks at Lee meaningfully. Lee smirks at her.)
Billy: But how could Connie Beth smuggle out enough to make it pay?
Francine: Oh, Billy, are you kidding? In every PTA and council in America, there are at least a dozen Connie Beth representatives. It's a national network! Like the Masons.
(Lee's head is down, thinking, but suddenly he puts it up and walks back over to the desk.)
Lee: They only use the people they can really trust, like these . . . Golden Circle Girls who personally ship the orders without knowing it.
Billy: Thousands of little packages going out every day through thousands of different trade offices.
Lee: Very tough to trace.
Billy: Lee, we gotta get somebody inside Connie Beth and see exactly who's involved. Oh, and pull the King woman out of this.
(Lee looks up as if suddenly remembering . . .)
Lee: Oh, my god, Amanda!

(Connie Beth headquarters. Amanda arrives in time for a sales meeting. She walks to a desk in the lobby. A woman, seated behind it, smiles and hands her a packet of papers and a pen.)
Amanda: Thank you. (She walks through a door and closes it behind her. Bobby's two men walk up to the door and look at it. One man nods. They walk away again.)

(King kitchen. Dotty is at the counter. The phone rings and she picks it up.)
Dotty: Hello?
(At IFF, Lee is on the phone with Dotty.)
Lee: Hello, is Amanda King there?
Dotty: No. No, she had to go to some kind of a sales meeting. Who is this?
Lee: Uh . . . uh, Honeycutt, uh, Typewriter, just calling to double-check on her shorthand speed.
(Lee paces back and forth, waiting for Dotty to finish.)
Dotty: Ah, how wonderful. My daughter was afraid she wasn't going to hear from you people. Uh, look, uh, speaking not as her --
(Lee finally hangs up on her. He marches out the door and passes Billy. Lee talks without stopping or turning.)
Lee: Connie Beth Cosmetics.
Billy: Right.

(Bobby's big room. The picture of his mother is hanging. The room is full of women singing and clapping the tempo. A woman on a platform under the picture is leading the jingle.)
Women (singing): Connie Beth. We salute you. Here's to a beautiful world. Everyone can be lovely. You can ask any Connie Beth girl. Show me the way to others learning to polish the pearl. Life can become your oyster. Just ask any Connie Beth girl.
(Amanda is in a corner at the back of the room. She is clapping along, but her eyes are saying "Why are these people singing?" When the song finishes, everyone applauds and takes a seat at tables. Amanda sits with Harriet and Judy. The woman on the platform stands behind a podium.)
Woman: Now, our final item of business, ladies, concerns our new tawny buff bronzer pour les fammes.
(Next to Amanda, Harriet opens a bottle and smells it.)
Harriet: Mmm.
(She offers it to Amanda, who sniffs it.)
Amanda: Ooh. It's nice.
Harriet: Isn't it great?
Amanda: It really is, yes. (Harriet puts down the jar. Amanda leans in to her.) Uh . . . listen, Harriet, did you ever open one of the packages that the company gave you for your special clients?
Harriet: Oh, Amanda, of course not. I am a Golden Circle Girl.
(Amanda smiles and nods. She turns her attention back to the woman at the podium. Bobby and his two men appear on the balcony. The look down at Amanda.)
Woman: Sample packets may be picked up in the foyer. (Amanda turns to Harriet and smiles.) Guard them with your lives, ladies!
(One of the men points to Amanda.)
Bobby: Are you sure that's her?
Man: Absolutely.
Bobby: Then I believe we should have her in. (He takes his wallet out of his pocket and writes something in it.) For a chat.
(He pulls out the piece of paper he was writing on and hands it to the man. The three of them leave the balcony.) Woman: . . . for those trouble spots.

(Downtown. Lee's Porsche is coming up the street.)

(Back at the sales meeting. The woman is still talking. She holds up a picture of a frowning face.)
Woman: And finally, a frowning face to that Connie Beth girl who was heard saying that our competition, Lovely Lady, is "icky." (All the women gasp in shock.) My friends, Lovely Lady is not icky. They are misguided and deserve our pity. (cheerfully:) And soon, we will trample them into the dust. (Ladies laugh.) Because what's our motto?
Women: Sell, sell, sell!
Woman: Precisely. (All the women applaud. Another lady walks up to the podium and hands the woman a pink envelope. All the women quiet.) Ladies, the magic moment is at hand. Today we will announce the names of those chosen to enter our golden circle. (She gestures to the back of the room. Bobby's men part the curtain to reveal a large golden circle. All the ladies "ooh" and "aah." A harp plays. Amanda raises one eyebrow and stares. The woman opens the envelope.) Now our new Golden Circle Girls will kindly stay behind today for a private meeting with our guide to greatness, and younger skin, Mr. Bobby Bushard. Rise, ladies, and welcome our sisters into a new light! (Ladies stand.) Our first Golden Circle candidate is . . . Marge Clapton!
(Marge gasps and walks fromthe back of the room to the golden circle. The women sing again.)
Women: She's a Golden Circle Girl, yes she is, yes she is, she's a Golden Circle Girl, yes she is!
(The ladies continue repeating that verse, while Marge walks through the circle.)
Woman: Linda Babcock! (The same thing happens again. Linda gasps, hugs her friend and walks through the circle while everyone sings.) Marion Malone! (Again, gasping, congratulating, shaking hands, singing, and walking through a giant circle. The woman takes the last name out of the envelope. It is the paper Bobby wrote on, and it says "Amanda Morton.") Oh, and, um, Amanda Morton!
(Amanda is standing there, clapping the beat, not really listening. Harriet stares at her. Judy runs over.)
Judy: Morton! Amanda, that's you!
Amanda: No, it can't be.
Judy: Yes, that's you! Amanda, go for it!
(Bobby's men, with smiles pasted on their faces, walk over and lead her to the circle.)
Amanda
: It has to be a mistake.
(Amanda leaves with the men. Harriet sulks.)
Judy: Harriet, don't be like that.
(The men force Amanda into the circle, holding a gun to her. They turn and go up some stairs, leaving the oblivious ladies singing.)

(Lee's Porsche drives up outside. He gets out and runs to Harriet, who is leaving.)
Lee: Hey, is Amanda still here?
Harriet: Yeah, she's inside with Bobby Bushard. Do you know they made her a Golden Circle Girl? (Lee runs inside.) Lee!
(Harriet turns around, then leaves.)

(Bobby's office. Amanda is seated. Bobby is walking around her, giving her the third degree. One of his men are standing nearby.)
Bobby: Let's uh, start again, hmm? What were you doing in the Bodine house on the night of Frank's little . . . mishap and what are you doing here now?
Amanda: Mr. Bushard, I'm just a Connie Beth trainee.
(Bobby walks over to her and leans in close.)
Bobby: Do you know what lying does for your skin? Lying causes stress and stress wrinkles the skin. Capillaries burst, skin flakes. A lying face is not a pretty face. Now tell me what you were doing in the Bodine house and what did Frank say to you?
Amanda (terrified): I went to borrow a cup of sugar, and Mr. Bodine didn't say anything to me because he was already dead.
Bobby: Willfulness is even less attractive than lying! (The phone buzzes. Bobby picks it up, still keeping his eye on Amanda.) Yes? . . . Affirmative. (He hangs up and walks back over.) My mum, the late, great Connie Beth Bushard, she built an empire, knowing the intricate workings of a woman's mind. Now thrashing you about, while fun, might yield very little. On the other hand, thrashing someone you care about may get me what I want poste-haste!
(He opens the door. Lee is pushed inside. Amanda whirls around in her seat. Leeyanks his arm from the man.)
Amanda: Oh, no. What are you doing here?
Lee (straightening his tie): Rescuing you.
(Amanda smiles weakly.)
Bobby: Okay, kids, let's take it from the top. Tell me about yourselves, and don't skip a beat. Once I get nasty, not even Connie Beth's top of the line can make those faces adorable again.
(Lee looks from Bobby to Amanda to the man. Then he looks forward and back to Amanda.)
Lee: Well. I just hope this makes you happy. (Amanda widens her eyes and stares at him, bewildered. Lee looks at Bobby.) Okay. You caught us. It's true. We were spying. (Amanda's jaw drops. Lee glares at her.) And you listen to me. You were the one who said spying for the competition was so easy.
Amanda (dazed): I never said that. (Lee shakes his head. Still she stares. He glares back. Suddenly she realizes what he is doing.) He's the one who wanted to do it! (Lee looks back and forth.) He's the one who said that there was money in it!
Lee: What?
Amanda: Yes, that's right! Yes, oh, yes. (Bobby looks from one to the other.) It's true. I'm not a Connie Beth girl. I'm a Lovely Lady!
Lee: Oh, the whole damn thing was her idea. She was whining, oh, we needed more money, more this, more that!
(Amanda opens her mouth and stands up out of the chair.)
Amanda: My idea!
Lee: Yeah!
Amanda: I was perfectly happy where we were. I was working in lipstick, I was moving my way up to tweezers! You said I needed diamonds, I needed diamonds, I needed furs!
Lee: Oh, I should have known better than to trust you! I'm telling you, she masterminded the whole thing!
(Amanda screws the top off a can of hair spray.)
Amanda: I don't like diamonds, I don't want diamonds, (she holds up the open can, her finger poised) I don't even like this stuff!
(She shows Bobby the can and sprays it in his face. He screams. Lee turns and kicks the other man. the man falls. Lee grabs Amanda and the two run out.)
Lee: Come on, come on!
(Bobby yells to the man to chase after them. The man takes a gun out of his pocket and runs out.)
Bobby: I hate women!
(Lee and Amanda run down the stairs to the room where the sales meeting was held. The door is locked. The man is coming after them, so they run down some more stairs and the man fires a shot. It hits the wall. Lee and Amanda run through a fire escape door. They stop. The other man is running up the stairs toward them. Amanda and Lee turn and listen through the door. Bobby meets up with the first man and directs him to the fire escape. Amanda turns to Lee.)
Amanda: Where now?
Lee: I don't know.
(He takes her hand and runs up the stairs. A second later, Bobby and his men burst through the door and run down.)
Bobby: Hurry! That way!
(The man almost bumps into the other man running in the opposite direction on the stairs. He turns around and they both run up after Lee and Amanda, who keep running and find themselves on the roof. They stop and look around.)
Amanda: Oh, no!
(The men continue running. Lee and Amanda hear them and shut the door. They both lean against it. Lee looks at Amanda.)
Lee: Quick! Go and get something to bar the door! (Amanda runs and brings back a skinny metal rod. Gunshots start to come through the door.) No, not that one! Get the big one!
(Amanda turns around and gets a nice big wooden board. She hands it to Lee, who uses it to bar the door. Amanda jumps out of the way, just as another gunshot comes. Lee runs also, grabs her hand, and leads her to another spot on the roof. They crouch down behind a big plaster thing, huddled close together. Across the way on another roof, workmen are receiving a wrecking ball. Lee sees this and leaves Amanda to go to the edge of the roof and look down. A large crane is supporting the ball. It sends the ball over to their roof. Lee grabs onto it.)
Lee: Amanda! (She cautiously creeps out from behind the thing and reaches out her arms. Riding on the ball, Lee grabs her.) All right, hold on tight.
Amanda: Oh, my gosh!
(The barred door is being pushed open. The crane swings them out from on top of the roof. Amanda screams. Their feet are dangling beneath the ball. Just then the door opens. Bobby and his men push through in time to see their targets being pulled away. they shoot, but miss. Amanda screams again. Bobby and his men run over to the ledge. The crane lets Lee and Amanda down slowly. When they reach the ground, a police car pulls up. Lee waves to the crane workmen.)
Lee: Thanks for the lift! These guys will explain! (Bobby and his men sink down below the ledge. A back car pulls up next to Lee and Amanda.) Anderson! Bobby Bushard and his men are up on the roof, go on! (He finally looks at Amanda. She steadies herself on the wrecking ball, then lets go. The stands, wobbly.)
Boy, I thought these guys would never get here. Let's go.
Amanda: Yeah.
(He takes her arm and leads her off.)

(Downtown. Lee and Amanda are walking on the sidewalk. A police car passes them. Lee watches it go, then turns to Amanda, who is still shaky.)
Lee: Are you all right?
Amanda: Oh, I'm, I'm, yes.
Lee: You're sure?
Amanda: I'm sure. I'm really . . . I'm all right.
Lee: Well.
Amanda: Well, tell me. What was in those hair dryers, anyway?
Lee: Oh, the terrorist guns we were after. Look, you want to get a drink? I'll tell you all about it.
(He turns to face her. They stop.)
Amanda: Uh, no, I can't. Maybe some other time. (Lee nods. She looks down and takes off her ring.) Give you this. Guess I won't be needing it anymore.
(She places it in his hand.)
Lee: Yeah, right. Yeah, I guess the honeymoon is over, huh?
Amanda: Right. I guess so.
Lee: You know what the whole problem with our marriage was?
Amanda: What?
Lee: It just wasn't very exciting.
Amanda: Yeah.
(They laugh uneasily.)

(King house. That night. Amanda is on the couch with her boys. They are all in their robes. Dotty is sitting nearby, listening.)
Jamie: . . . i . . . e . . . t . . . l . . . y. Quietly.
Amanda: Terrific, sweetheart. That's much better.
Phillip: How's my math, Mom?
(He hands her a paper.)
Amanda: Oh, your math is beautiful. You're both a couple of geniuses. Okay, get upstairs, get in bed, I'll tuck you in in a minute.
(The boys get off the couch.)
Jamie: Good night, Grandma!
Dotty: Good night, love.
(Amanda stretches and checks her watch.)
Amanda: Well, I guess I'd better call Dean before it gets much later.
Dotty: Hmm. When you took so long getting home, he got quite concerned. I mean, he tried to pretend that we wasn't, but I could detect that little quiver, that vaguely strangled quality in his voice.
Amanda: Mother.
Dotty: Amanda, I just think concern is an important quality. That and dependability. Dean is dependable, don't you think?
Amanda: Oh, yes, he is, he certainly is. Absolutely.
Dotty: There is no question about it. I mean, the trouble with some people is they vanish from your life just as quickly as they came. With some men, you can have an absolutely thrilling evening and there's no guarantee that you're ever going to see them again. You know what I mean?
(Not knowing what she just said, she puts her glasses on and reads the paper.)
Amanda: Yeah. Tell me about it.
(She gets up.)

(Street. Lee is driving down the road. He takes Amanda's ring out of his pocket and looks at it. He smiles fondly and continues driving.)
*This episode was directed by Rod Holcomb!